bUGLYbLOG

Have you ever been embarrassed at a party because of your healthy looking smile? Are you tired of taking crap from your jackbone friends for not using drugs? Do you feel like an out of place southerner? If you answered yes to any of these questions, Marvin’s Meth Teeth may just be what the doctor ordered. Developed in labs right here in the hills of Tennessee, Marvin’s Meth Teeth aim to give you that strung out look without the messy side effects associated with meth and crack usage. Dainer Cross, founder and president of Marvin’s Meth Teeth in Oliver Springs, Tennessee, came up with the idea after being knifed in Dandridge late one evening. “I got cut because I had a nice set of choppers. They thought I was some sort of agent or something. I grew up in Newport and we never got past the wacky tobacky. Hence, my choppers, aside from one that got chipped by an errant horseshoe thrown by my cousin Ernie, are in pretty good shape. A man can only get knifed so many times. So after a couple days of thinking while in the hospital, I came up with my Marvin’s Meth Teeth, named after the son of a gun that stuck me”.

Marvin’s Meth Teeth will initially be sold at the Alcoa highway Green Acres flea market, but agreements are being solidified to make them available this spring at concessions stands at local sporting events (tee-ball games, little league football, etc.) throughout east Tennessee. They will also be available for junior high and high school fundraisers.